seven quick takes: linky links

This week I'm giving you Seven Quick Links!

First, click here to watch a quick video of an orangutan who's charmed by the sight of a newborn human. Everyone loves babies. Even orangutans.

Next, an interesting article on why most people in indigenous cultures don't have back pain, while in developed cultures it's so prevalent. (Spoiler alert: our core muscle tone kind of sucks.) 

So apparently, in 1917, a school in Oklahoma got new chalkboards. And they just slapped the new ones up over the old chalkboards... without erasing them. And recently, while remodeling the school, the contractors discovered the untouched chalkboard drawings. Fascinating view of the past.

You've probably heard of the "Leave No Trace" policy in parks and nature preserves, which discourages folks from taking rocks and flowers, and going off-trail, and otherwise disturbing the natural environment. It seems like a good idea, right? But it's possible that by disallowing children from truly interacting with nature, we're raising up a generation that doesn't care about nature at all.

Did you see this video about the preschool in the nursing home? You need to watch it. It actually brought tears to my eyes.

Okay, this is really cool. This painting was created in such a way as to Mess With Your Mind. Even after you read the article to learn how it was done, the video is still pretty unbelievable.

Finally, how about some Catholic silliness? 25 Popes Who Just Can't Even Right Now.

Linking up with Kelly at This Ain't the Lyceum! Oh, and stay tuned for Josie's Ladybug Birthday Party recap. It was super cute, and one of our 3-year-old guests dubbed it "The Best Party Ever!" (And also, a recipe roundup was requested and is forthcoming. Promise.)

seven quick takes - ed. 26

1. You guys! YOU GUYS! I know it's been, um... awhile... ok, 3 months ...since I last posted, but I'm not dead! I just felt like life was getting a little out of control, and I needed to take a bit of a break to get things back in hand.

Awkward introverts unite!
(I mean in spirit. Not in person. That would be, well, awkward.)

2. In fact, not only am I not dead, but mathematically speaking, I'm kind of the OPPOSITE of dead. I mean, if regular = 1 life, and dead = 0 lives... well...

Two lives = extra-alive? Anyway, Miss or Mister Extra Life will be arriving late April 2015. :o)

("Two lives" meaning mine and baby's. Not twins, thank goodness. I don't have anything against twins, but I'd be shipped off Guam for medical reasons if there were twins. Like, by myself, without my family, to waste away in a hospital in Japan from 24 weeks until delivery. Which would, to put it mildly, be really crappy.)

Possibly this was part of the reason things felt like they were getting so out of hand. First Trimester Terribleness-- you know what I'm talkin' 'bout. But now we're 19 weeks so everything is happy.

3. We had fun hosting Thanksgiving for a bunch of friends this year. No family nearby means Friendsgiving, which is exactly what we did. Sixteen people total, counting babies. (There were rather a lot of babies.) And I kind of... forgot to take pictures. But I was busy with turkey and mashed potatoes and sweet potatoes and rolls and salad and gravy and all kinds of goodness, so I think that's fairly excusable, right? Also, PREGNANT. ULTIMATE EXCUSE FOR EVERYTHING.

4. How's your Advent going? We're trying to be mindful that It's Not Christmas Yet, while still being festive and fun, because being completely un-Christmasy all month makes us a little depressed. So here's what we've got going on:

- Our Christmas tree is up, but only has lights (and a star) on it. We'll add the garlands on Gaudete Sunday, but won't put the ornaments up until Christmas Eve. Last year we tried waiting until later to set up our tree, but Guam only gets a couple of shipments of live Christmas trees, and they tend to get them bizarrely early (bizarre especially considering they're not super-fresh when they get here).

- We're lighting the candles on our Advent wreath every night at dinner, and Faith adds an ornament to the Jesse Tree.

- We're listening, at least mostly, to Advent music rather than Christmas music (but we're not totally against a few carols now and then).

- We've got a purple-and-pink garland hanging in our dining room... which we'll replace on Christmas Eve with a holly-leaf garland and mistletoe.

5. Faith is 3-1/2 this year, so it's the first year she's actually excited and anticipating things. However, she also has a hilarious 3-year-old perspective on everything. I told her that St. Nicholas was coming to leave her a present tonight, and showed her the St. Nicholas prayer card, and she got SUPER weirded out. "Why he coming to my house?! I no want him! He's not my best friend!!" (That's her current way of saying, "I'm not a fan of you/him/her right now." As in, "Mommy, I don't want to clean up! You're not my best friend!!" However, when I specified what St. Nicholas would bring (a book and chocolate), and clarified that she wouldn't actually have to see him (she's quite shy), she was mollified. Somewhat.

6. She's also been paying unexpectedly close attention to the lyrics in the Advent music, and asking for rather difficult definitions. "Mommy, what means 'rejoice'?" "What means 'gloria'?" "What means 'forever'?" Hmm. Parenting is hard.

7. You may have seen this already, but I laughed.

Head over to Conversion Diary This Ain't the Lyceum for more Quick Takes! And Happy Advent!

answer me this: media-consuming and hand-shaking edition

1. What is your favorite room in the house?

This might be a little strange, but I really like the girls' playroom. Not that I, personally, love spending time in there (it's not put together with adult comfort in mind), but I'm kind of proud of it. I think it's a good playroom-- pretty cute, reasonably organized, toys that I mostly don't hate looking at, fairly enriching.

2. Do you subscribe to any magazines or other periodicals?

Well, there's Pediatrics. And Pediatrics in Review. And, um, that's it. Just medical journals. I am boring. (Faith gets High Five, but technically we don't subscribe to it; Jack's grandma signed her up.)

3. How do you feel about the sign of peace in Mass? Enriching? Awkward? Overdone? Just right? Some combination of the above?

Well, I grew up in an Evangelical church where we had a "turn and say hello to your neighbor!" segment every church service, so when I first started attending Catholic Mass, the sign of peace seemed totally normal to me. As I've gotten a bit more orthodox/traditional/whatever, I don't love it as much. But I don't really mind it. I like the origins of it-- how you're not supposed to receive communion if you have anything against your brother, you should be at peace with everyone, and all that. (I just learned that apparently that's not the origin of the sign of peace, at least in the Latin rite, according to this article anyway.) It just seems, the way it is now, in most churches, like kind of an interruption of Mass. So I'm ambivalent, I guess.

4. What is your least favorite sound?

Babies screaming when they should be sleeping. *shudder* I did let them "cry it out" when we were sleep training, and it totally worked (eventually... Josie was persistent). But the sound just.... I can literally feel my blood pressure going up and my heart rate quickening when I hear it, and I truly break into a sweat. Even now, as I sit here just thinking about it!

5. What was your favorite TV show (or shows) growing up?

When I was little tiny, it was Sesame Street all the way. When I was a bit older, I liked watching Star Trek (Next Gen, baby!) with my mom. When I was a teenager and college-aged, I liked crime-solving shows like JAG, CSI, Law & Order, and Criminal Minds. (I still like crime-solving shows, actually.)

6. What are your favorite TV shows now?

The Walking Dead, Mad Men, Doctor Who, Supernatural, Sherlock, Downton Abbey. And Firefly and Breaking Bad, though they're not, y'know, on anymore. That sounds like a lot, I guess, but I generally watch them in Netflix Bursts. A few of them I'm not even "caught up" on, since I started late.

Anyway, head back to Catholic All Year for more folks' answers!

seven quick takes - ed. 24

1. Last week my Facebook feed was full of news stories about Gaza and ISIS. This week, it's full of articles about Robin Williams.  This one, by Fr. Dwight Longenecker, is probably my favorite: Robin Williams, C.S. Lewis and the Demons that Drove Him.

And for what it's worth, it's okay to feel sad about Robin Williams being so depressed he felt suicide was the only option, AND feel sad about the atrocities in Iraq, AND feel sad about the fighting in Gaza. One doesn't negate the others. And we SHOULD be sad about Robin Williams, even if we don't have a tearful emotional response to it, just as we should be sad when anyone commits suicide-- or honestly, when anything bad happens to anyone. All humans are connected in ways we can't understand, and a tragedy that affects one person has ripple effects that touch all of us. It hurts everyone when something bad happens, even if it doesn't happen to us directly.

2. We had an earthquake the other day! It was 5.4, but only lasted a couple of seconds. It was actually over before I even realized what was happening. Not nearly as impressive as the one a few years ago in the DC area-- which I was also there for. Fun stuff!

3. As we sat down to dinner the other day, Faith said, "Daddy, you want a beer?" And then she went and got him one. We've trained her well.

4. This is seriously one of the funniest things I've ever read.

5. Look what we spotted on our way to my workout group yesterday! He (or she?) was actually pretty big-- a good six inches across, I'd say.

6. This is pretty funny: Should you be worried about Ebola? A helpful chart. (Language warning.)

Ha! But, for serious, here's some good info: Ten Things You Really Should Know About Ebola.

7. And finally, I saw this at the hospital (no worries, it was just a checkup for the baby):

At first I was super confused, like, um, is this a common mistake? I feel like if people are drinking from toilets, the lack of water filtration is the least of their problems...

But then an architect friend of mine gave this helpful response: "You are required to post these signs if you have a gray water system. Even as we buy them we think it's ridiculous!!" 

THE MORE YOU KNOW!

Head back to Conversion Diary for more Quick Takes! 

answer me this: pretty church pictures edition

1. Do you have a smart phone?

I do. It probably says something bad about me that I feel like I couldn't go back to life pre-iPhone. How else would I solve the argument about "That's the same actor who was in ____" without bothering to get up from the couch? In all seriousness, though, I use it as my planner, timer, reminders, music, primary camera, I look up medical stuff when I'm at work, etc.

It's kinda crazy though, right? Ten years ago we were all "la-di-dah, I'm out on the town, I'll find a payphone if I need to call someone" and now we're like, "OMG WHERE'S MY PHONE DID I LEAVE IT AT HOME I WILL DIE WITHOUT IT."

2. Which is your favorite meal of the day?

Dessert. Once the babies are in bed and I can eat ice cream in peace-- HEAVEN. Or maybe coffee. That counts as a meal, right?

3. Shower or bath?

Shower. Bathtubs are generally too short for me to be able to stretch out comfortably and relax. Oh, the woes of being a tall girl.

#tallgirlproblems (no, these aren't my legs.)

4. Think of a person you love. How many days have you been in love with that person?

2,788 days. Our first date was on October 13, 2006. I guess I don't know if I was "in love" with him then... but I think it counts, seeing as we've been together ever since!

5. What's the best church you've ever been inside?

The most beautiful church I've ever been inside is the Our Lady, Queen Of The Most Holy Rosary Cathedral in Toledo, Ohio. Yes, Toledo!! It's the church we used to attend when we lived there, and it's where I became Catholic-- Easter Vigil 2009!

Jack, me, and Fr. Singler after Easter Vigil

My favorite church, community-wise, was the parish we left when we moved to Guam-- St. Bernadette's in Silver Spring.

6. Happy Feast of the Visitation! Has anyone ever come to help YOU?

Yup. Right before Josie was born, we learned our au pair was going to be leaving a little earlier than we thought, which left us with no one to watch Faith when I went into labor. My parents drove down from Ohio and spent a couple weeks on the sleeper sofa in our guest room to help out. (My dad even sneakily vacuumed the whole house-- which we hadn't done in way too long-- while Jack was at work and my mom and I were out with Faith!)

Click here to head back to the linkup at Catholic All Year!

what we're reading wednesday: something other than god

(Okay, it's early Thursday morning for me, but I wrote this post yesterday.)

I'm sure most people reading this post have already read or started Something Other Than God by Jen Fulwiler, so I don't need to provide a synopsis. I really, really enjoyed it (*cough*readitin24hours*cough*) and was actually brought to tears more than once. A few things about it really struck me:

1. I thought she did a phenomenal job of really giving us a look inside the head of an intelligent atheist. Reading the early chapters, I really felt like I was truly seeing things from that worldview, not just looking at it from the outside. That's a pretty remarkable thing, especially for someone who's never not believed in God.

2. The final chapters made me excited to be a Catholic convert again. There was a recent post by Katrina at The Crescat talking about the glow and enthusiasm of the new convert, and how that enthusiasm can fade a bit over time. She points out that the excitement often transforms into a deeper familiarity, which isn't a bad thing... but I think the periodic renewal of that excitement is very valuable, too. We're rational beings, but we're also emotional. Knowing the True and striving for the Good are great things, but it's also great to thrill to the Beautiful. And this book helped me find that thrill again. 

3. I was really struck by the passage where Jennifer comments on how much easier it is to strive to be good after reading about the lives of the saints, rather than reading about theology/philosophy/morality in theory only. I don't know why this never occurred to me before, but when I read that paragraph, it hit me like a thunderbolt. I suspect it's also an excellent remedy for those feelings of superiority and holier-than-thou smugness that can creep in when you're not looking-- there's nothing like looking straight at undiluted goodness and bravery to serve as a healthy slice of humble pie. Of course the life of Christ is the ultimate story of goodness and bravery, but we've heard it so often that, sadly, it can sometimes lose its shock value. Fortunately, the Church is just brimming with holy people to read about, each one gloriously unique and bringing a fresh perspective to holiness. 

4. I would, in a second, recommend this book to anyone who wants to know more about Catholicism-- especially if they're skeptical about it. As is pointed out in the passage where Jen and Joe are reading the blog comments from Steve G., the only thing that really distinguishes Catholicism from Protestantism is the belief in the authority of the Church (if you believe in that authority, everything else follows naturally), and this book explains that so well. (I loved the analogy to the Supreme Court and the Constitution.) I'm seriously considering giving a copy to my Evangelical parents because it's such a great, clear explanation. I think my dad, especially, would like it.

Now I just need to nag Jack to finish it, because I'm so anxious to have someone to discuss it with!

Linking up with Jessica at Housewifespice! 

marian ramblings

This post has been lurking in my drafts for awhile, but after reading this post by Daniel Stewart, I thought it was time to bring it into the light!

I'm not a cradle Catholic.  My family attended a Lutheran church when I was little, but when I was in third or fourth grade we began attending an evangelical "mega-church" (this one, to be exact). It was great, in all the ways that those kinds of churches tend to be. Everyone brought their highlighted and dog-eared Bibles to church every Sunday, there was a band that played worship songs that were both catchy and moving, the sermons were relevant and Scripture-filled, and you could be fairly certain that your neighbor in the pew was either "on fire for God" or wanted to be. I attended the affiliated Christian school from 6th through 12th grade, where every semester we had a required class on Christianity (or "Bible class" as we called it, because, you know, evangelical)-- one year on marriage and family, one year on in-depth Bible reading, one year on apologetics (that was a good one-- the stuff I learned in apologetics class still influences my life).

But then, in 2009, I converted to Catholicism.

This post isn't going to be a "conversion story"-- I'll save that for another day. Suffice it to say that my beliefs haven't "lost" anything in the transition, but have only gained scope, depth, and assurance. (The only thing I "lost" was the guarantee of an "on fire for God" congregation. Sad but true, but obviously not limited to Catholicism. See: mainline Protestantism.)

When I converted, I embraced fully the teachings of the Church. Because, I mean, what would be the point otherwise? If you don't believe everything the Catholic Church teaches, then you don't believe in the Catholic Church and there's no point in calling yourself Catholic. It would be like saying, "Yeah, I'm Republican, except I'm in favor of graduated tax rates, and I think health care should be single-payer, and I'm pro-choice and in favor of gay marriage and affirmative action, and I think we should have tighter gun laws and looser immigration laws, and we should cut funding to the military. But, you know, my family is all Republican, so it's cultural." That makes no sense. But it makes MORE sense than calling yourself Catholic and disagreeing with the Catholic Church, because the Church isn't just a set of ideological views from which you can pick and choose... the whole concept behind the Catholic Church is that it's the church established by God and therefore contains the fullness of truth and His authority on earth.

BUT (and here's where we get to the whole point of this post... longest. introduction. ever, amiright?) despite intellectually agreeing completely, and consciously trying to adjust my actions accordingly, sometimes I find myself having trouble getting emotionally on board. Devotion to Mary, specifically, has been on my mind lately. It's not that I have any difficulty believing in the teachings about Mary. It's that I have trouble feeling devotion to her-- I know of course, that "feeling" something isn't required, but it something that can be helpful-- and something that can be cultivated.

I'm sure that this difficulty is related to my evangelical background. Now, I was never part of the subculture of Protestantism that disparages Mary (a subculture that makes no sense to me-- if God chose her, who are we to disagree?). In my church growing up, she was considered important in her role as Jesus' mother, and she was someone who was considered admirable and virtuous. But we just didn't think about her that often, other than at Christmas. Not nearly as much as, say, the writers of the New Testament.

So I've been trying to think of ways to increase my devotion to and just day-to-day awareness of Mary. I've got this book lined up in my books-to-read pile, and a couple more in my Amazon Wish List:
- Walking with Mary: A Biblical Journey from Nazareth to the Cross
- Imitating Mary: Ten Marian Virtues for the Modern Mom
(And thanks to the post I linked to at the top, I'm adding Mary and the Fathers of the Church to my list.)

Any other ideas? If any of you have been in this situation (which I suspect is common among converts, especially former Protestants), what have you found that helped you?

listen to me!

During a frustrating afternoon with my strong-willed girls last week, I posted the following on Facebook:

Faith, PEE IN THE POTTY instead of holding it. Josie, GO TO SLEEP instead of fighting it. We will all be happier if you will just LISTEN TO ME.

Jack and I were chuckling about it that evening-- how clearly we know what will make them happy, but they just won't do it. "Faith, your discomfort will go away if you empty your bladder. Promise." "Josie, you'll feel less miserable and cranky if you take a nap." It's so obvious to us that it's laughable.

But then Jack thoughtfully pointed out, "That's probably what God says to us."

How true! We foolish children don't do the very things that will give us joy-- and the worst part is that, unlike babies, we actually know better, deep down. 

In one of his talks, Peter Kreeft elaborated on this point (I know I've quoted him before-- listening to his podcasts was one of the biggest factors that helped me in my conversion).

We need to appreciate the problem before we can appreciate the solution. And the problem is not simply that we are imperfect; young piglets are imperfect. Or that we're mixtures of good and evil; delicious strawberries with a few rotten spots are mixtures of good and evil. The problem is not just that we're sheep wandering away from safety, foolish spoiled selfish children. Of course we're that. But we're much, much worse than that. We're not just morally weak, or morally bad. We are morally insane.
The word probably shocks you, and seems exaggerated and unrealistic-- and that's part of our insanity, by the way: denial-- so I shall now try to convince you from your own experience that you are insane. And I think if you are honest with yourself you will not be able to deny the facts that I am about to remind you of...
You know-- we all know, there are some things we can't not know-- you all know that there are two roads. There is good, and there is evil. There is the straight, and there is the crooked. There is the narrow, and there is the broad. There is Straight Street, and there is Broadway. You know that every day in life is full of big and little choices between those two roads, beginning with your very first conscious thought as you wake up in the morning. You know very well what lies down those two roads. You know that not just by faith, and not just by reason, but by experience, for you have walked down both roads many, many times, and you have always found the same living quarters there.
You do not have to believe-- you know-- the peacelessness and the joylessness and the regret and the shame, and above all the hiding and the self-deception and the self-loathing that lies down one road. And you know who it is that you never meet on that road, who you abandon on that road. Sin means not just doing "no-nos," but not doing God. Sin is a "No" not just to the Law, but to the Lawgiver, who is love, who is the gift of self that is the secret of joy.
And you also know with equal certainty and from the same experiential source that deep peace and joy and satisfaction, and even self-esteem, that meets you down the other road. And who always meets you there, who gives these gifts, and yet you repeatedly choose Broadway over Straight Street, many, many times. You prefer misery to joy. You are insane. Welcome to the human race; that's original sin.

The full text of the talk can be found here; you can download the podcast here (the talk I quoted is called The Dark Side).

seven quick takes - ed. 14

1. How crazy and cool is this? Scientists discover children's cells living in mothers' brains.

Chimerism is when two lines of genetically distinct cells coexist in a single being (the most common example in humans is after organ transplantation). This article talks about an example of microchimerism, which is where one organism contains only a very small amount of genetically distinct cells. They don't really know the medical implications yet, but I think the philosophical/theological implications are just as interesting when you put it this way: the children you carry are literally part of your body for the rest of your life-- whether they are carried to term or not. (Of course, the article doesn't specify exactly at what point in the pregnancy the cell transfer happens, if they even know. It would clearly have to be after implantation, and probably after the placenta is a bit more well-developed, which happens over the course of the first 5-8 weeks or so.)

2. Why you should never, ever put two spaces after a period. My self-professed inner grammar-geek is horrified that I've been typing incorrectly for the past 18 years. I blame my 6th-grade typing teacher. MRS. BESCHTA, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME? (And yes, I keep typing two spaces by accident and then going back and deleting one of them. It's very time consuming.)

3. Speaking of grammar, here's an article on a personal pet peeve of mine: Woah! Why are you spelling it that way?

(Hint: it's "whoa.")

4. The Real Reason Pediatricians Want You to Vaccinate Your Kids. Here are a couple of quotes from the article that give the gist (though I highly recommend reading the whole thing):

"I often wonder why a parent who believes vaccines are harmful would want to bring their children to a medical doctor at all. After all, for immunizations to be as malign as their detractors claim, my colleagues and I would have to be staggeringly incompetent, negligent or malicious to keep administering them."

"What breaks the deal is that I would never truly believe that these parents trust me. Giving kids vaccines is the absolute, unambiguous standard of care, as easy an answer as I will ever be able to offer. If they don't trust me about that, how can I hope they would if the questions ever got harder?" 

5. Okay, time to lighten the mood. This made me laugh:

Source

SCIENCE PENGUIN!

6. Catholicism + Doctor Who? YES, PLEASE!

7. Random discovery via a Facebook friend's link: a haunting series of surreal photos by Martin Vlach.  See more here.

Head over to Conversion Diary for more Quick Takes!

saint of the year

So I joined the crowd with the Saint's Name Generator... and got someone I'd never heard of.

St. Paul Miki was a Japanese Jesuit in the 1500s known for his eloquent preaching, and became one of the 26 Martyrs of Japan (whose feast day is February 6th) when he was forced to march 600 miles and then crucified (!!) for his beliefs in 1597 at the age of 35.  Legend has it that he preached his last sermon from the cross and forgave his executioners before he died.

Preached his last sermon from the cross?! Talk about inner peace in the midst of chaos!  Can you imagine?!  And I act like my trials are so difficult.

St. Paul Miki, pray for us.

supermom wannabe + word of the year

Do you ever look around and think, "Oh yeah, I got this"?  (Yeah, me neither.)  Or at least "I think this is actually going to work and then life will be AWESOME"?  And you have this amazing plan to organize your entire life, so that your prayer life will be deepened, your marriage will be perfect and fulfilling with nary an argument, your house will be clean, your budget will be flawless, your children will be polite and precocious, your parties (oh yes, you'll throw parties) will be gorgeous, your plan to get in shape will actually happen, and you'll finally get around to reading all of Shakespeare.  Those plans always work out exactly the way you anticipate... right?

Any Myers-Briggs aficionados out there? Yeah. INTJ here.  I'm always trying to come up with an overarching solution, a master plan that will solve and organize everything.  And while I do actually enjoy planning and scheming and such, it can be frustrating when those plans don't come to fruition.

(Pinterest recipes, anyone?)

Cari at Clan Donaldson posted recently about asking the Holy Spirit to help you discern a word of the year-- a word to meditate on and try to build your life toward.  I thought this was a lovely idea, but I was a bit skeptical that I would be able to come up with such a word. And if I did, how could I be sure it was the one God wanted me to discern?

Enter New Year's Eve.  The prior two nights had been full of late-night rocking, fussy babies, and multiple awakenings. I already knew there was no way I was going to make it to midnight. I felt like I was post-call in residency again-- that nauseous, dizzy, please-I-will-give-you-money-if-I-can-just-lie-down feeling.  And then Josie, my poor teething runny-nosed baby, was refusing to go to sleep. I was deliriously tired (at like 9:30pm, haha) so I gave in and just brought her into bed with me.  Now, we're not really co-sleepers. She's been in her own room for months. Normally I would feel like this was backsliding, and beat myself up with Mothering Angst. But as I drifted off into blessed sleep, the word that popped into my head was "peace."

Peace with this situation. Peace with things not being perfect.  Peace with a little mess in my life-- not as if everything must be all peace, all the time.  I remember a story I read once about a king who held a contest for all the artists in the kingdom to illustrate the concept of peace. Most of the artists painted scenes such as beautiful landscapes of blue skies, green fields, and calm lakes.  But the winner's painting depicted a thundering waterfall crashing over a cliff in the midst of a raging storm-- with a mother bird sitting contentedly on her nest behind the falls.  Peace in the midst of chaos.  It's easy to feel peaceful when everything in your life is going right, but that's not the test of true peace.

I do struggle with the idea of how to keep a balance-- how do I make peace with where I am without becoming complacent, or just plain lazy?  I mean, I don't want to be unreasonably hard on myself, but we should all of us strive to be better than we are, right?

Maybe it's more about letting go of frustration. Not so much thinking that problems don't need to be fixed, but accepting that they don't need to be fixed right now.  Realizing that it's okay to stop and take a breath.

Wishing you peace in 2014.

(PS- I don't know why this post initially appeared way down at 12/27, since I wrote it long after that.  Editing in the hopes that it will now appear in the correct order.)

paradigm shift

This.

I think the key is to stop thinking about children as if they’re some kind of unnatural, foreign intruder in your married life, like a bug on a wedding cake. While it’s true that we are called to do all sorts of important, interesting things in our adult, married lives, it’s also true that having babies is a good thing, a positive thing, a beautiful thing.

Read more here.

happy belated halloween / all saints' day / all souls' day

So now that we're almost to Thanksgiving, time to recap Halloween, right?

We took Faith Trick-or-Treating in our neighborhood, which is the first time she ever remembers doing it.  (I took her around to a grand total of 3 houses last year, but she was only 20 months old.)  She was a super-adorable Red Riding Hood.  Tons of people stopped us to tell us how cute she looked.

I knit the hood/cape (with cotton yarn-- this is the tropics!) based on this Ravelry pattern, but instead of buying a pewter fastener, I just knit I-cord ties.  It worked out really well!  The dress was a vintage find on Etsy, and I sewed the apron out of an old pillowcase (I am a terrible seamstress, but this was pretty easy.)

Oh, and not to leave Josie, MD out:

Her "costume" was just a set of doctor-themed pajamas which were a gift from my dear friend Laura when Faith was a baby.  No muss, no fuss.

Faith had a blast going from house-to-house, although her shyness kicked in and she was quiet at every door.  In between, she was her usual excited self, pointing at the next house and exclaiming, "Dis one!!!"  "Look!  Punkins!!"  "Oooooh, LIGHTS!!"  And when I asked her what she was supposed to say, she'd recite, "Twick oh tweat!"  But when she actually was confronted with a smiling grown-up holding out a massive bowl of candy, she'd go totally mute.  Ah well.  Perhaps next year.  She did enjoy the candy.

(Don't tell her, but we swiped some from her basket to give to other trick-or-treaters... there were so many kids that we were running out!)

On All Saints' Day, Jack and I had to work, sadly.  The girls' regular daycare was closed, along with all the public schools on the island (Guam is super-Catholic, you guys) but the child care center on base was open, so we just used that one for the day.

For All Souls' Day, I stole this idea (discovered on Pinterest):

Here was our version:

The idea is to write on  glass candleholder the names of all friends and family members who have died, to help us remember and pray for them.

We also made Soul Cakes!  We got the recipe from this website, which also talks about the origin of soul cakes and trick-or-treating.  (I cut the recipe way down, though, as it would make a huge number of cakes as written.  Good if you were going to give them out, I suppose, but I wasn't expecting any children to come "souling.")

seven quick takes friday - ed. 7

Whoops.  Written on Friday, posted on Saturday.  Days-Of-The-Week Fail.

1.  Finished with my board exam, thank goodness!  Jack and I spent the 2 hours afterward going back and forth with "Did you have the question about..." and "What did you put for..." like big nerds.  Also: can anyone explain to me why a computerized exam, which everyone nationwide takes over a single 3-day period, should take 3 months to grade?  Alas.  Anyway, now that I don't have to study every spare minute, I have time to waste on the internet!  Thus the rest of the quick takes are all fun internet-y things I've checked out this week.

My house and I are the opposite of this.  Clearly.

2. "My Parents Brainwashed Me" - a teenaged boy at a "poetry slam" competition talks about how he responded when a classmate told him he was brainwashed by his parents.

3. #overlyhonestmethods is apparently a hashtag used for Twitter confessions about how scientific papers and research projects are not always as science-y as they seem.  Here's a collection of some of the more hilarious ones.  I'm not a bench scientist, but I've had enough experience to know how true these are!

4. Look!  If you give your Starbucks barista these instructions, he or she can make you a Butterbeer Frappuccino!  How yummy does that look?  Too bad there's no Starbucks on Guam.  Sad face.

5. My sweet husband has not only forgiven me my Twice obsession, but he sent me a link to this site on Facebook.  It looks pretty fun -- you give them your size, proportions, price range, and style preferences, and they send you a package of clothes and accessories to try.  You only keep (and thus only pay for) what you like, and send the rest back.  I'll have to try it and report back with the results!

6. Here's a cute video showing the reaction of a bunch of kids after attending an orchestra performance.  This is why kids are great.  They just take things as they see them, without any pretentiousness or trying to impress others.

7. This is a great informative blog about the Catholic teachings on sex, marriage, and contraception which Simcha Fisher linked to a few weeks back, but which I've only just gotten around to checking it out.

That's it! Go to Conversion Diary Clan Donaldson to see more quick takes!